Realization
by WickedlyAwesomeMe
Summary: Read my other story, “11 Things” first before this one-shot… Due to some people’s demand, here is James, Hermione, and Draco’s date that was implied in the story but never happened. Read and review, please :D


**Title: **Realizations**  
Author: **2booklover4**  
Language: **English**  
Verb Tense: **Narrative Past; Dialogues in Present tense**  
Form: **One-shot**  
Genre: **Romance/Drama**  
Rating: **T**  
Warning/s: **Contains spoilers from my other story, "11 Things"**  
Ship: **Draco/Hermione**  
Summary: **Read my other story, "11 Things" first before this one-shot… Due to some people's demand, here is James, Hermione, and Draco's date that was implied in the story but never happened. Read and review, please :D

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**A/N: And yes, I'm back. Wow, it's been months since I've posted something. Anyway, if you're really paying attention to the summary, this is somehow I scene that was never seen (hahaha, that rhymes!) in my previous finished story "11 Things". I just made it into a one-shot because I think my story will somehow be "ruined" if I added this. **

**So, that's it. Enjoy!**

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**Realization**

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James Moore was positive this was the most awkward day he ever had in his seventeen years of life.

He was currently seated beside the most beautiful girl in the coffee shop (well, for him). When Hermione came down from her staircase, adorned with a beautiful light blue dress, he honestly thought he was going to faint right there and then. The fact that he would be spending the rest of his day with his beautiful ex-Healer made him feel slightly nervous, yet exhilarated.

As the days passed with her visiting him everyday even if she wasn't his Healer anymore, James begrudgingly accepted that she was lovely and intelligent. She was the first one who showed him _happiness, care, _and _love. _She was the only one who made him laugh. She was the only one who gave him hope that maybe he would be cured from his accursed _Odium Deprecor_.

And thus, he finally realized he had met his first crush.

It was weird for him. He was seventeen. She was twenty-five. She was eight years older than him. Like Shakespeare and his wife, Anne Hathaway. The said bard's wife was eight years older than him, too. But they had three children. It was enough proof that the saying 'age doesn't matter' was true.

He might have the best day of his life, only it was awkward. The cause of his awkwardness? Two words.

_Draco Malfoy_

His blasted Healer who was the blasted son of the blasted owner of the blasted St. Mungo's. It was enough to make him scowl deeply upon seeing him seated beside Hermione. He was glaring, too, and he knew that the blond wanted to be anywhere and everywhere but here.

'_The feeling is mutual,' _he thought.

But both knew that they would survive the day all because of the brunette seated at the middle. She was the wall that stopped them from hurtling each other with terrible hexes (or punches, really). She was the wall that made them stop doing something stupid and making her think that they were acting as if bunch of immature kids.

Draco Malfoy was his rival. Sure, he said Hermione wasn't his girlfriend and that they were just best friends. But heck, only daft people would not notice how the blond looks at her. But then, he remembered Hermione didn't know his best friend was in love with her. That made his scowl deeper.

"What do you want to order?" a waitress came, cutting him off from his trail of thoughts.

"Coffee," Draco said without scanning the menu.

Beside him, Hermione frowned. "Aren't you going to eat something?" she asked.

"I'm not hungry," he said and directed a sharp glare towards James. The seventeen-year-old gladly returned his glare with a more burning one.

"All right then, I'll have one blueberry and cheesecake," she said. "Oh, and hot chocolate, too." As the waitress jotted Hermione's order, the said brunette turned her head to look at James. "What do you want to order?" She flashed him her usual smile and all thoughts of bastard Draco Malfoy left his mind. Instead, the thought of beautiful Hermione Granger flashing him her lovely smile filled his mind.

"I'll have the same as hers," he said without looking at the waitress, slightly dazed as he smiled back at her.

"Make that three," Draco suddenly piped in, pulling James out of his daze. Malfoy was glaring at him, unsurprisingly.

"I thought you're not hungry, Draco," Hermione said. She sounded confused, yet amused.

"Yeah, Malfoy, I thought you're _not _hungry," James added.

"It's none of your business, _Jimmy_," the blond spat back, a large scowl adorning his pale, handsome face.

"Draco…" Hermione warned and James couldn't help but flash a smug smile towards the albino. Draco scowled and was about to retort something back, but thought not to, so he instead just clamped his mouth shut.

Their orders came after a few more minutes. James was savoring his sweet dessert. Who knew blueberry and cheesecake would taste good? It was his first time to eat something like this because before, all he ate was plain, bland hospital food and he swore that he'd someday throw up because of how disgusting the food was.

From the looks of it, Hermione was enjoying her dessert, too. She was adorable, in his opinion. She had this wide smile on her face after every bite and chew. It was like she was a little girl eating blueberry and cheesecake for the first time.

"It tastes good, doesn't it?" she commented, her question directed towards Draco. He only grunted in response, earning a disappointed frown from the brunette. The albino git was only playing with his food. His eyes were narrowed into thin slits as he glared at the delicious dessert.

'_Why tag along when it's obvious you do not want to be here?' _James asked him in his mind. He wanted to shout that question to him. Very, very badly. But once again, he didn't want Hermione to think that he was an immature child unlike the other guy seated beside her.

They continue to eat their food in silence. James thanked Merlin for the great food he ate.

He looked at the other occupants beside him. Hermione was already eating the last piece of her scrumptious dessert. Draco's dessert, on the other hand, was left untouched. James rolled his eyes and drank the last remnants of his hot chocolate before placing back the mug on the table with a soft 'thud'. He had this wide smile on his face as he focused at Hermione, blocking the blond from his sight and his mind.

"So, where do you want to go?" he asked her.

Hermione scratched her chin in deep thought before a mile-wide smile stretched on her face. "I know where," she said.

She sounded so enthusiastic even Draco was driven to look at her.

The brunette looked from her best friend then to James before announcing chirpily, "Happy Land."

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"What a lame name," James announced as Hermione dragged both him and Draco to the Amusement Park she wished to go. "The owner must have a _wide _imagination. Imagine naming his own amusement park as _Happy Land. _Utterly hilarious."

The albino git scowled deeply while Hermione laughed, amusement written all over her face.

"What?" he asked, confused.

"You know, Draco had said exactly the same thing when I told him about Happy Land Amusement Park," Hermione told him. And then, just as fast as the speed of light, James' expression mirrored Draco's.

Hermione realized what she said triggered sour moods to both of the males she was accompanying and so, without further ado, she pulled both of them to the roller coaster.

"Where are we going?" James asked, confused as he watch the particular ride go up slowly then suddenly rushes down before going up slowly once again.

"Roller coaster," Hermione announced, eyes shining with excitement.

Doubt fell on the teeanger's face. In his opinion, the ride seemed kind of dangerous. He found it quite amusing people kept on screaming their lungs out. It was obvious they were slightly horrified they were riding this dangerous ride.

"Scared, Moore?" the blond sneered.

James glared at him. "As if, Malfoy."

And with his three words, both knew a competition began. Draco's glare was enough proof and, even if he did not voice it out, James knew what his glare meant.

_May the best man win. _

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"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" James screamed so loud he swore he would spew out his lungs. Wind rushed bitingly against his skin as the roller coaster went down, allowing gravity to finally pull it down. His skin was flapping against the wind and he felt like his skin would rip off from his body.

He felt embarrassed for screaming shrilly like a silly, little girl. But, then, judging from the other screams from other males in the roller coaster ride, he knew he wasn't the only one who would be mocked endlessly by their female companions once they were safe on the ground.

Hermione was screaming so shrilly it was almost hilarious. There was this horror-stricken look on her face as her hair billowed against her face. From the looks of it, the brunette was terrified of heights. She had once told him how she despised riding broomsticks. But, it made him wonder why she continued to ride it again and again.

The funniest person he had ever seen was Malfoy. Like the others, he was downright terrified. He had this wide eyes and gaping mouth as horrified screams were emitted from his parted lips. It was amusing, especially since he had always seen Malfoy as a stubborn and bastard-y git.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!" James screamed once again as they plummeted down the ground abruptly. He released a small groan as they went up once again. _'This would be a long ride,' _he told himself.

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A long ride it really was. Actually, after their first try, a second followed, and then a third, until they had rode their tenth one.

James discovered it wasn't terrifying the second, the third, or the tenth time. It was actually fun for him. He even wanted to ride for the eleventh time but because of Draco Malfoy who was now currently puking on a trash bin found in the amusement park, he was now waiting as Hermione patted the blond's back for comfort.

He found it disgusting and at the same time amusing as a green Malfoy vomited all the contents of his stomach. He remembered clearly that he had never eaten a single bite from his blueberry and cheesecake but now, he was emptying a lot of contents. It was funny. Maybe he really wasn't hungry at all when Hermione asked him if he didn't want to eat.

"My poor, little Ferret," Hermione told him, a wide smile stretched on her face.

Draco only glared at her as he conjured a tissue and wiped his mouth. Unfazed, Hermione conjured a cup and filled it with water with a soft _'Aguamenti' _so as not to attract attention from the surrounding Muggles. He gladly accepted it and gulped it down quickly.

James watched this little exchange between the two with a frown. It still bothered him they were calling each other with pet names like… like… like… a _couple_. It bothered him that Hermione fondly called him 'Ferret' while Malfoy _fondly _called her 'Beaver'.

Another was that they were inseparable. It was obvious they had to see each other at least a few minutes of their day. One cannot do anything without the other. Again, they were acting like _couples_.

Hermione might not love Draco but the fact that she greatly cared for him was annoying him to the eleventh power. The fact that she showed great concern for the blond was making him so, so jealous. He knew Hermione wasn't his possession… she wasn't Malfoy's possession either. But seeing them, _together_, made him practically a green-eyed monster.

Sighing, he rolled his eyes imploringly at the heavens. Who knew having his first crush made him feel very, very possessive? He missed the times when he would just stare blankly at a book he had read for countless times or the times when his mind would just detach itself from his body and wander around.

But he knew that if he was still experiencing boring activities from his past life, he wouldn't have met Hermione. If he was still experiencing boring activities from his past life, his _Odium Deprecor _might still be on the deadly stage or worse, he might be six feet from the ground already.

"I'm hungry," the albino announced, cutting James once again from his musings.

The teenager scowled at him while Hermione rolled her eyes. "The hotdog stand?" she offered.

Draco perked up, much to James' surprise. His eyes brightened and a wide smile stretched on his face. He might not know what 'hotdog' is but he had a great feeling it was something delicious to the point of making Malfoy very, very happy.

"The hotdog stand, then," Draco said and started to walk to a specific direction. Hermione followed him and James, having no choice, followed them, too.

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The walk to the so-called 'hotdog stand' was a long one and James found himself suddenly bored. His arms were swinging back and forth as he continued to walk, Hermione beside him and Draco beside her.

He was annoyed the 'hotdog stand' was far away from the roller coaster. They had past different kinds of food stands already and once, they didn't stop. Malfoy, apparently, wasn't the only hungry person in the trio.

James looked at his side and saw that even Hermione was swinging her arms back and forth, back and forth. His eyes traveled from her swinging shoulders, down to her elbows, until to her free left hand. And suddenly, he had an urge to grab her hand and hold it tightly.

He wasn't feeling bored anymore. Instead, nervousness settled on his fast beating heart. It was as if her hand was mocking him to grab it. Her swinging hand made him slightly irritated, giving him a greater urge to envelope her hand with his to stop it from swinging more.

Unable to help it anymore, he stretched out his hand and grabbed her hand. James might have surprised her greatly because she released a very loud gasp. His cheeks reddened as her eyes traveled from their holding hands to his eyes.

Surprise was evident on her eyes but soon, she broke into a small smile. He breathed a sigh of relief as Hermione continued to hold his hand, not making any move that she wanted to pull her hand back.

Malfoy's eyes were burning holes at their clasped hands. He could feel it without even looking at the albino.

And he felt so smug he had the nerve to give him a triumphant smile. Draco only scowled and looked away, a stubborn pout now adorning his handsome face.

Hermione might have felt his glares because just a few minutes after she and James held their hands, she stretched out her free hand and grabbed Draco's left.

Both males were surprised with her action. But Hermione only shrugged, smiled, and then looked straight ahead.

Draco seemed pleased with her actions because he then returned the triumphant smile James had flashed at him a while ago.

The seventeen-year-old was the one who was scowling now. Why did Malfoy really tag along? It was supposed to be a date between him and Hermione! He didn't ask him, for goodness sake! All he remembered was asking Hermione out, not him.

He was seething so hard he even noticed the difference of how they held Hermione's hand. His might be slightly timid and embarrassed, since he was not used in holding her first crush's hand. Draco's, on the other hand, was holding her hand comfortably.

It was painfully obvious they had held hands a lot of times before.

And from the way he gently cradled her hand, from the way his thumb rubbed small circles on her palm, and the way he _discreetly _tried to entwine his fingers with hers, James could see love radiating from the way he held Hermione's hand. Yes, it was a simple gesture, but it spoke _volumes_.

"We're here!" Hermione announced enthusiastically. James momentarily forgot his jealousy since hunger overpowered it.

The 'hotdog stand' was somehow small yet many people crowded in front of it. Hermione released both of her hands from their grasps to make her way towards the counter and order three long and red food which James soon discovered was the best food he had ever tasted in his whole life.

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Hermione was currently being carried by the blond at his back as she silently dozed off, her head buried under the blond's shoulder. She was dead tired with all the activities they had done in Happy Land Amusement Park. James didn't have the heart to feel jealous once again since he himself was dead tired, too.

They'd finally reached Malfoy's grand car and he opened the back door, carefully laying down Hermione on the backseat so as not to wake her up.

Not having any more room, James knew he had to ride shotgun. He did it begrudgingly, not wanting to be beside the blond, but did it nonetheless.

Draco sat himself on the driver's seat, fastened his seatbelt, and ignited the car. James copied his action of fastening his seatbelt and the next thing he knew, they were moving on the road already.

The first few minutes of the ride were a silent one. James didn't initiate any conversation with Malfoy, not knowing what the tell him, and thankfully, Malfoy didn't initiate any conversation, too.

James would look at the rearview mirror every once and a while to check the sleeping Hermione. She was very peaceful when sleeping, he had noticed, and every time he averted his eyes back on the road, a small smile was evident on his face.

He now looked at the driver of the car and noticed he was too absorbed in maneuvering the car. His eyes then averted towards the sleeping Hermione the back to the blond.

Unable to help it, he blurted out, "You're a damn great liar, Malfoy. Do you know that?"

Draco momentarily looked at him in surprise before focusing his eyes back on the road. "I don't know what you're talking about, Moore. Now shut up and stop talking. I'm too tired to fight with you."

Being the ever stubborn teenager, James continued, "You know, if you continued to act all innocent, Hermione would one day be snatched away from you."

The blond's cheeks reddened before a scowl appeared on his face. "Who are you? My mother?" he growled. "Don't lecture me about things you do not understand yourself, Moore."

James scoffed. Hearing this, Draco turned around and glared at him. "I'm warning you, Moore, do not continue what you want to say if you don't want to be kicked out from my car. AND, don't you dare say Granger's going to defend you. She's currently sleeping, for your information."

"_See_!" he exclaimed with great emphasis. "You're acting in denial and all. It's annoying, Malfoy. It's _sickening_. Seeing you sulk around if Hermione's been asked out on a date? You just tag along just so you'd be sure she won't be stolen away from you."

"_You're testing my patience,_" he said, his voice dropping dangerously into octaves. But James wasn't miffed.

"Coward," James sneered. "At least I can voice out that I like Hermione."

Draco stepped on the brake so abruptly James' forehead almost bumped against the dashboard.

He looked at Malfoy in surprise then at Hermione. He was amazed that the brunette was still asleep even after Draco abruptly stopped the car.

"You do not know what you're talking about," Draco growled, eyes ablaze. He took deep breaths as he tried to calm himself.

For James, he was slightly murderous. He knew he was skating on thin ice already but decided to continue.

"Was it because she's sick?" he asked.

And right then and there, James knew he had hit the target.

Bull's eye.

Draco's mask of calmness broke and a vulnerable man crept in. James had seen it and was horrified at what he had seen. But then, his mask was suddenly on his face and the look of the vulnerable man was gone once again.

James stared as the blond slowly calmed himself. He watched as he took big, soundly gasps so as to breathe properly. And as he remembered the vulnerable look that spread across his face, he remembered someone he knew so much it had hurt.

_Himself_.

He had seen that hopeless look on Draco's face before – him staring at his own reflection when he was still afflicted with _Odium Deprecor_.

James distinctly remembered the time when Hermione told him he and Draco were so much alike with a great big difference – the twenty-five-year-old was full of life and hope.

When he was young, he had heard things about the Malfoy family, most especially with the Malfoy heir. He was sure all the obstacles he had encountered were very challenging. He was sure that the challenges Malfoy had encountered when he was young weren't normally encountered by normal kids of his age. But he was surprised to hear from Hermione that he was full of life and hope despite all the things he had encountered.

James then realized that it was because someone had helped him.

_Hermione_.

Maybe his love for the brunette saved him from all those bad memories he had went through in the past. Maybe his love for the brunette gave him a reason to always wake up in the morning and go out to meet the world instead of lock himself in his room for his guilt and all the bad things he did.

Maybe it was his love for the brunette that made him forgive himself.

He remembered the time when Draco screamed right in front of his face that Hermione was spending nights looking for a cure for his _Odium Deprecor _instead of spend those nights look for a cure for her own disease. As he contemplated that fact, he was moved with her care. Hermione truly wanted to help others before herself. It made him smile to know that she really was Harry Potter's best friend, the brain of the Golden Trio, and the helper of the savior of the Wizarding World.

Draco ignited his car back to life and manipulated it until it was moving on the road once again.

James allowed a few minutes of silence before saying, "Thinking of dying soon is no joke, Malfoy. And don't tell me I don't know what I'm talking about because I've felt that ever since I was thirteen-years-old." He paused, allowing another moment of silence to pass. "And I think it will be fair for Hermione to know what you truly felt for her before she… leaves you."

"Shut up," Malfoy said, irritation radiating from the tone of his voice. Desperation was there, too. He was desperate not to talk about that topic anymore.

Perhaps, Hermione was right into thinking that Draco was full of life and hope. But when he caught a glimpse of his vulnerability, James was afraid that life and hope was slowly slipping away...

And with that, they went back to Hermione's apartment in silence.

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James watched once again as Draco gingerly lifted Hermione from the backseat into his arms, bridal style, before walking inside her apartment. He followed inside, not making any noise so that he wouldn't wake up the brunette.

He watched Malfoy as he brought her in her bedroom. He watched him as he protected her head so that she wouldn't bump into some of her furniture. He watched as he pulled her closer to his chest so that he could give her more body heat. He watched him as he gently placed her on her bed and tucked her under her blankets.

He watched him as he gave her a lingering goodnight kiss on her forehead.

"Sleep tight," he whispered, brushing off her bangs from her forehead. Since she was obviously asleep already, Draco had just said her usual answer to his farewell greeting. "Don't let the bed bugs bite."

When the blond turned around, he almost jumped in surprise to see that James was still there. "I thought you went home already," he said.

"Obviously, you thought wrong," James pointed out.

Draco only rolled his eyes and walked out of Hermione's bedroom door. But before he could completely go back to his car, he looked at James… _warningly_. "Touch a strand of her hair and you're dead, you hear me?"

"Loud and clear," James said and this time, he was the one who rolled his eyes.

The Malfoy heir looked back at the sleeping brunette for the last time before turning around. James waited for the sound of his car ignited before slowly crossing the threshold.

If he was asked who the first person who showed him true peace, he would say without any doubt that Hermione Granger was. Looking at her sleeping was enough to calm someone's troubled heart. He had bet Malfoy had watched her sleep for a lot of times already.

James sat down at the edge of her bed and continued to watch her sleep. Sometimes she would shift on her bed or mumble incoherent words under her breath.

He didn't know how long he had sat there and watched her sleep. Watching her slumber was strangely fascinating to him and so, he couldn't bring himself to avert his eyes away, stand up, and apparate away.

But he knew he should go. And so, mimicking Draco's actions a while ago, James bent down and gave the brunette a lingering kiss. Before he could really lift his face away from her forehead, he caught sight of a stuffed toy – a ferret, specifically – sitting motionlessly on top of her desk. And, even if it was the first time he saw her sleep, he knew she would always hug that stuffed toy of hers. So, without hesitating, he grabbed the white ferret stuffed toy and tucked it between Hermione's arms and chest. She released a sigh and a small smile stretched on her face.

James stood up and walked away. He was about to apparate back to the house he had long abandoned but decided not to so that he could walk back. Walking made him clear his mind and he swore his brain was going to explode anytime for all the things bothering his mind.

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He marveled at the cool wind blowing as he face as he walked at the deserted street, hands buried deeply inside his front pockets.

Walking for him was really magically because now, he had realization. Painful ones but still, they were realizations.

He realized that his feelings for Hermione and Draco's feelings for her were way too different. He knew that what he was feeling for Hermione was silly, small crush. Hell, he couldn't even say out loud that he was _in love _with her already. But Draco's, on the other hand, was true… it was genuine. He had a feeling that what Malfoy had felt for Hermione were buried deep down in his heart for years and as years passed by, it grew and grew and grew…

He realized that Malfoy's vulnerability, fear, and hopelessness was reasonable. Hermione Granger has lung cancer and thus, her time was running out. At the same time, Draco was running out of time. He had to tell her as soon as possible or else, she might just drop dead at any time.

He realized that what Hermione had told him a few months ago was right. He and Malfoy were so much the same. And now that she was slowly dying, he knew the 'full of life Malfoy' and 'full of hope Malfoy' would soon vanish. And thus, they would be more and more the same.

And finally, he realized one thing – he had to back-off in order to make two people happy. That was one thing Hermione had taught him. He was finally given life and hope once again but two people were slowly dying – one literally and the other figuratively.

And so he would back-off and let them figure out the feelings developing between them.

And maybe, they could be happy once again.

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**A/N: And end! Did you like it or not? I honestly thought the ending was crap-ish. Review, okay? **

**So, I had a feeling you were surprised when I made a one-shot. I remembered I told some I won't write a chapter about the threesome's date but the soul of a plot bunny possessed me and manipulated me to write this. And so, thank her if you must. **

**I also remember that on the thirteen chapter, I hinted that James and Hermione were still having meals together (and sometimes Draco tags along) but for clarity's sake, I just want to tell that James had backed off already. That's the reason why he's engaged with Cindy in the Epilogue, right? **

**I found it funny that James' fiancée name was Cindy. AND, you know Jimmy Neutron, right? It's like, one of my most favorite cartoons. And Jimmy's name is James and the girl he's paired with is named Cindy! Hahaha, I just realized it a few days before.**

**Lastly, I just want to apologize that I haven't updated anything these past few months. School had been hellish and please, don't think I'm exaggerating. **

**Anyway, that's it. I missed you all and your reviews so… you know what you'll next do, right? **

**Hahaha, ciao for now!**

**Love,**

**2booklover4**

**P.S.**

**Dearest tiger-eye-heart, if you're reading this I'm so sorry I posted this already. I couldn't wait for your edited version, you know. But I promise if you sent me the edited one, I'll delete this and post yours. That's all :p**


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